Would you like corn with your corn?

Just over a week ago my car conked out and is a bit dead and in need of a great deal of repair which is just gonna have to wait for a couple of weeks til I save up.  Apparently lack of galavanting turns me into my mother…  I made soup the other day…. I kid you not.  F**king soup?????? What the hell is that all about? Hot on the heels of this I was a little under the weather,  and got shoved on anti biotics again.  Considering doctors arent supposed to be happy dishing em out any more mine seem to think I can have em like sweeties.  So anyway thats why Ive been gorn for a few days,  but Im gonna have a wander round and see what everyones been up to in the next couple of days,  cos its gotta be more exciting than my week.  In fact if it hasnt please make some shit up. 
The alcohol has completely left my system and Im now viewing the world through sober eyes.  Bit pants really innit?  So lets see,  what have I done this week…..
I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can’t make Tuesdays or Thursdays.  I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn’t reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high." So i went to the chinese restuarant and a duck came up to me with a red rose and says"Your eyes sparkle like diamonds" I said "Waiter i asked for aromatic duck……………..
Ok so I didnt actually do any of that last bit……. sheeeeeeesh Ive dun nowt I told ya!
Right Ill leave you with this.  Dunno if youve heard of em but they make me laugh so much cos they make serious sounding songs about the stupidest sujects.


8 Responses to “Would you like corn with your corn?”

  1. LOLNowt wrong with making soup kiddaI made some chicken and veg broth last week – 2 breasts (Maaaatron) and a pound of veg. Lasted me 3 days !Wonderful.Fave is Broc and stilton though.I know what you mean re lack of booze – weird ain\’t it ?he heI had my fortnightly evening out last night – not that it was intended to be a full night out of course. And was then whacked in the chops with notification that British Gas drained my bank account this morning. Gits.So, another dry 10 days – I ought to be fit by now dagnammit !Have a fun rest of yer weekend SausCx

  2. HAHAHA pop on POP\’s … anytime!!!! (glad you clawed back … hehehehe).and no alcohool? too bad, that kills the germs … no wonder you need antibiotics ! hehetake good care of you and hope you\’ll feel better soon!I am really happy to see you back !!!! alex xxxx

  3. dying2die Says:

    Hi Daf well well hope u get well soon im with fever and flu etc since 26th Feb – it keeps coming and goin and no medications – my sis is a doc though – I take ginger tea usually but this time i didnt even take that so im still with it – take care Regards

  4. Sorry to hear about the car, Daf. They can be tricky little beggars if they\’re not looked after properly. I remember the last time I took my car for a service. We managed to get it through the doors, but we had no idea how to manoeuvre it past the font.As for making soup. I\’m right with you there. Don\’t get me wrong, I like soup, but making it is a bit of a bind. I\’m okay with the microwavey bit, but it\’s the tin opener I have trouble with.Love & Laughter to you babe,StevexxxOh yeah, sorry to hear you\’re not so well. Get well real soon…. and check the dosage requirements on your meds, cos you seem to be turning into Tommy Cooper, and that\’s not a good thing… well, at least not like that.

  5. DragonBoy Says:

    Afternoon…Ducks wear wellies???!!!!!…. Doesn\’t that interfere with your swimming mojo? Being a welly wearer myself (I\’m Professor of Puddling Sploshing at Puddle University) I\’ve never found them to be the most streamlined of aquatic footwear. Good for getting a rather pleasant SPER-LOOOOOOOOSH when jumping in gatherings of water but i find my mid-afternoon swim at my local baths is somewhat hampered if i forget to remove them. May I suggest something in the webbed footwear range…?On a second point, shouldn\’t you be up to your wingpits in muck? Or are you some sort of bizarre hybrid? And surely that\’s a clue that you really need to have a tidy round if it\’s that deep. I normally wait until i\’m wading before, reluctantly, deciding that i need to tidy…Mind you… you are of a more \’squat\’ demeanour so perhaps your wingpits are at everyone else\’s ankle level… even still… can\’t imagine it being that pleasant… Anyway… I\’m gonna go sell my soul for jelly beans…***Mucky Monday Hugs***DB xxx

  6. sober? I too have had this ailing my as well darling!what next eh?

  7. Ditto, Daf you also have a very cute blog here . its very interesting . hope you have your car going by now. how terrible that must be just sitting around home. my car was down for over a year . hmmm boring! but its running now . It really did SUCK! lol

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