Dressed to kill (or maybe not)

So last week I had a wee shopping trip.  The week before I’d been dress shopping with my daughter,  looking for something for her Leavers Ball.  After looking at every dress in the Metro Centre (and trust me there were many) and  managing to  avoid having our souls sucked out in the department store (I’m not surprised it’s the first place the Zombies will go when the apocalypse comes) she settled on something completely gorgeous that didnt make her look like a dodgey bridesmaid or a meringue.  So anyway,  while we were looking I’d seen this dress I rather liked.  Not a formal one,  just a little summer thing but I liked it.  So over the next few days I kept thinkin ‘ya know I really wish Id bought that’ so eventually made a dash back and picked it up.  Sadly they didnt have it in the right size,  and I had a choice of goin up one or down one.  So being I’m kinda in the middle of sizes, cos I have to be awkward, I thought well I’ll go down one cos it’s better than having it hanging off me.  Big mistake.  Headed home and got in with 20 minutes to spare before I had to go and pick my son up from school.  Plenty of time to try a dress on you’d think.  Or it would be if having got the afore mentioned dress on  despite it putting up a valient struggle,  I could get it off again…but I couldn’t… and time was passing…

So having tried to writhe it over my head for about ten minutes I realised I had about five minutes to get dressed again and shoot out the door to go pick up school child.  Desperate times called for desperate measures.  Desperate times also called for scissors.  Managed to swizzle the sodding thing round so the back was at the front,  make a two foot cut down the middle of it and throw it on the floor in time to shove my t shirt and jeans on and run out the door. Maaarvellous!

Right I’m gonna leave you with this. Winner of Youtubes Ad of the year,  cos I think it’s just lovely!



13 Responses to “Dressed to kill (or maybe not)”

  1. Loved the dress story – pity you have to give it the chop!!!

    The video was impressive – still tearing up here! (God I’m a softy!!!!)

    Love and hugs!


  2. Hi Daf! 🙂

    Yes, the system IS meant to be looking after the ill, but they are using the ‘Malingerers’ excuse to force as many people as possible off benefits onto a collapsing job market.

    People are dying as a result and that can’t be good news to anyone but cold hearted number crunchers…

    Love and hugs!


  3. Planet Nicola Says:

    The moral of the story: always, Always, wear a seatbelt. And never, ever, drive an invisible car. Especially in the house when your wife’s just got your dinner ready!
    It’s a good and poignant advert but come on.. Are people really so stupid they need to be told? Seriously? When our dad gets in the car we always make him wear his seatbelt at the back, not so he doesn’t crush us all to death but because he has such difficulty removing it and then that gives us extra time to run off from him when we hit the shops! 😀
    (just joking, obviously! We don’t take him!)
    Lol jokkkeee..
    Anyhoos, all the men who are going to comment on this blog are gonna be pooping themselves – cos they’ve had years of getting it wrong when asked ‘does this make me look big?’
    I bet there isn’t a man alive who doesn’t know what it’s like to spend a night on the couch after buggering it up and telling us what we didn’t want to hear!
    Although I’m sure Mr Duck says all the right things even when he found your cut to smitherine dress on the floor!
    What a bummer it didn’t fit! I hate it when that happens (although it happens a lot cos I’m a bit lardy and way too lazy and fast to waste time in cubicles)
    Atleast.. Look on the plus side (ha, but I don’t mean that in a dress way)..atleast you’ll have some pretty nifty dusters to do the housework with!
    Hope little daffy has an awesome night at the ball..
    Have a smouldering weekend!
    Much love, Nic

  4. Planet Nicola Says:

    Oh.. And before anyone thinks it (I was just making light of the advert) I would never joke about crashes. I know of someone who got killed a while back and she was only forty five.. Only a few miles near to home aswell. A freak windy weather accident 😦
    Cars are dangerous… Specially when I’m behind the wheel, lol
    Tc.. Byeeey x

  5. I couldn’t bring myself to write a comment about a dress, so I’ll write something completely unrelated!

    Daff = HARDCORE!

    That’s good enough!

    Moocho love and hugs for tha Daf and have a great weekend, Mate! :O) xxxxx

  6. I do that sometimes too – buy a dress without trying it on. We really should know better shouldn’t we but we do it every bloody time although i have never had to cut one off. Last time I just didn’t eat for a few days, it came off eventually. 😉
    Love the ad…I’m with Nicola that it isn’t something that we should need to be told but every day I see many mainly kids hurling around without a care in the world for anyone elses well being and not a seat belt in sight – because they know it all don’t they?

    Not a big fan of the holiday park but it its a means to an end. I have been to them all over the country and they are the same wherever I go. Dirty, overcrowded with scumbags, expensive and in dire need of blowing up – but I have to take little miss J somewhere.

    Have a good weekend and week ahead.

    Pete X

    PS I’ve been to the Metro Centre a couple of times and found the place highly entertaining. Shoplifters who couldn’t care less if anyone was watching and I also saw a girl fall out of a pub, high heels, short skirts you know the sort. She went into a shop, tried on another dress, paid for it and kept it on and went back to the pub. Odd?

  7. Wow, what a powerful video, really amazing.
    That whole dress situation must have been a right pain, very annoying indeed. lol

  8. jennyozzy Says:

    lol try the goth shop daffy they have some fantastic dresses not all black either done the dress thing loads of times even got it so far over my head then stood there like ive hung myself and really exhausted when it eventually pulls off lol men have it so easy xxjen

  9. Androgoth Says:

    I’m just glad that you made it out of there in time…
    Of course you could have had to leave with it on,
    as is so to speak? lol Okay just kidding…

    Have a great weekend HRH Daffy…

    Androgoth Xx

  10. hi daf hows you and what you uo too this weekend whatever your doing have a good weekend xxjen

    • hey Jen!
      Well Ive just tried a hop and a skip over to see what you been up to and I cant find youuuuuu! Ive sent you a request but Im not sure its to the right site.
      Oh and I actually have a few gothy bits n bobs. Gotta love a corsett cos who doesnt look good in one aaaaand I have this lush purple and black long dress that I got off t’interweb a while back. Sadly there arent that many places to wear that kinda thing round here anymore and being a tad of a chameleon (which I probably just spelt totally wrong) I seem to find myself in other kinds of garb more.
      Anyway hope your site isnt gone for good!
      Hugs Daf xxx

  11. Androgoth Says:

    Have you gone AWOL again HRH Daffy?
    I do hope that you are returning very soon…

    Androgoth Xx

  12. Androgoth Says:

    I will have to send the Zombies out looking
    for you next HRH Daffy…

    Where are you? lol

    Androgoth Xx

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